No, You Don't Have To
/You’re stuck at home.
Well really, we’re all stuck at home. And if you’re not, you need to be (this you do have to do)!
Life already looks a lot different than it did one week ago, and it’s only going to change more the further along into this crisis we go. And - not to be alarmist - we do have quite a ways to go.
(Side Note: “Quite a ways” is such a delightfully odd phrase!)
And since we’re stuck home trying to cope, deal, and learn a new way of life, as the whole world is trying to adjust - all whilst the capitalist system tries to figure out how to retain its workforce and productivity - we’re being bombarded with ideas and advice.
Some of it is meant to be helpful.
Some is not.
Intentions aside, let’s dive into a few of these messages.
My workspace/bedroom gets some nice sunsets - so I thought I’d share one!
Go-Getter!
“Well this is it! Now’s the time! You’re stuck at home, so now you have the time to…[put together that business/try out that vocation/do that research/quit that day job/create that masterpiece/etc.]…that you always said you wanted to!”
Have you all seen a lot of this one?
It’s definitely been prevalent in the art world. The current meme/source of “encouragement” that has been floating around has been:
“After all, Shakespeare was quarantined when the theater shut down due to plague, and that’s when he wrote King Lear!”
…I mean, good for Shakespeare! That’s great for him!
He also likely wrote Macbeth and Antony and Cleopatra during that outbreak. Awesome. Neat. Cool.
You do not have to be Shakespeare.
Yes, we all suddenly have time on our hands to do things we’ve wanted to do, but you don’t have to.
I can guarantee you that there are reasons why you have not previously stopped your life to do these things (start the business, make the masterpiece, transform your living room, etc.) that still exist in your current moment. We’ll get to those in a moment.
Now, I’m not saying that if you want to finally do that thing, that you shouldn’t - if that’s what’s inspiring you right now then do it!! But this time of insecurity and uncertainty is not a prescription, calling, or assignment for you.
If now still isn’t the right time, then you simply don’t have to.
And there’s no reason to feel guilty about it either.
“Well, It’s Now or Never!”
I’m sure you’ve seen and heard this one coming from the media, online sources, and - quite possibly - the people you are quarantined with:
“You’ve always said you were going to do _______, so it looks like it’s now or never!”
Now, this is similar to the go-getter argument, but the key difference here is:
Go-Getter is about things you desire to do.
Now or Never is about things you feel you need/should do.
Often, these things take the form of chores, home improvement projects, deep cleaning rituals, new hobbies, or unfinished projects.
Things like:
Putting up that new shelving unit that’s sitting in the corner.
Updating your website.
Cleaning out the storage closet that’s overflowing.
Giving the kitchen that deep clean it’s been longing for.
Finishing that 1000 piece puzzle whose completed frame has just been sitting on the coffee table for months.
Decluttering your Inbox.
Reading that stack of books.
Etc.
These are often not fun things. And many times, these things give us anxiety, which is why we haven’t done them yet. So now, let me repeat:
Just because you currently have time stuck at home, does not mean you have to do these things right now.
You totally can, if that floats your boat or will help you/your family/your roommates/etc. I support you!
But if that’s not the way you feel about tackling these things, you do not have to.
But Why?
“But Michael, why don’t I have to? Shouldn’t I? I mean, I never get this kind of time at home…”
There are so many possible reasons why you don’t have to, dear reader
These reasons could be:
Time - Yes, time. Not everyone who is stuck at home is suddenly gifted with free time. Many people are quarantined with their families, including young or elderly people who need attention and care. And other people may be without a way to make any money right now, and are therefore dedicating all the time/attention they have to figuring it out. And there are other reasons that time may be scarce as well.
Anxiety - This is a big one. Recent studies have shown that upwards of half of the adult population in America may have some form of an anxiety disorder. Y’all - we are in the midst of a pandemic crisis being poorly and inconsistently handled, which is affecting every aspect of our normal, daily lives. This anxiety is real. And if that prevents you from doing anything other than sleeping and Netflix, that is totally valid.
Confusion - Anyone have a playbook for a pandemic crisis? …No? Precisely. There is no set timeframe for this thing, let alone a recipe for how best to get out of it or through it. We’re all making our best guesses, and the amount of information we do and do not know can be arresting. And right now, there’s no beacon of leadership or advice to follow.
Too Many Options - A lot of people suffer from something often referred to as “analysis paralysis.” Basically, you want to do things and you want to prioritize, but there are so many options and possible paths to take, that it becomes too difficult to actually do something. This is also valid.
…But the biggest reason of all, dear readers?
You do not owe your life to productivity.
Allow me to repeat that:
You do not owe your life to productivity.
You all know me at this point and you know that I love being productive. In fact, for the most part, I have been over the past five days of quarantine. I mean, good for me…? Sure.
But none of us owe productivity to anyone, when - for any reason - we just can’t.
Moving Forward
Is it likely that you will desire to do the things mentioned above during this shutdown?
Yes.
Is it likely that you will be able to do at least some of those things eventually?
Yes.
If you do start being productive, is that a good thing?
Yes, if that’s how you personally feel about it.
But we don’t have to. Certainly not right now.
All we have to do right now is make sure we have the essentials, reach out if we are in need, and be kind to ourselves and those around us.
These are difficult times, but I am confident that - even at a distance - we can and will get through this together.
